50+ Funniest Dad Jokes You’ve Never Heard

Dad jokes. They’re the cheesy, pun-filled quips that never fail to make us groan, chuckle, or roll our eyes.

Yet, despite their reputation for being predictably corny, there’s a certain charm to them that keeps us coming back for more.

In this blog post, we’ve compiled over 50 fresh, funny dad jokes that you’ve likely never heard before. So, get ready to laugh (or cringe) as we dive into the delightful world of dad humor.

1. Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field!

2. Why don’t skeletons fight each other?

They don’t have the guts.

3. I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.

She looked surprised.

4. Why don’t some couples go to the gym?

Because some relationships don’t work out.

5. I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.

6. Why did the bicycle fall over?

It was two-tired.

7. What do you call fake spaghetti?

An impasta.

8. Want to hear a joke about construction?

I’m still working on it.

9. Why don’t eggs tell jokes?

They’d crack each other up.

10. I don’t trust stairs.

They’re always up to something.

11. Why don’t scientists trust atoms?

Because they make up everything!

12. Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded?

There was nothing left but de-brie.

13. What do you call a bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear.

14. How do you organize a space party?

You planet.

15. Why did the math book look sad?

Because it had too many problems.

16. How does a penguin build its house?

Igloos it together.

17. What’s brown and sticky?

A stick.

18. I only know 25 letters of the alphabet.

I don’t know y.

19. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?

In case he got a hole in one.

20. How does a snowman get around?

By riding an “icicle.”

21. What do you call a factory that sells good products?

A satisfactory.

22. Why are ghosts bad at lying?

Because they are too transparent.

23. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?

A carrot.

24. Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged.

25. How do you make holy water?

You boil the hell out of it.

26. What’s the best thing about Switzerland?

I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.

27. Why don’t oysters donate to charity?

Because they are shellfish.

28. Did you hear about the Italian chef that died?

He pasta way.

29. What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work?

A can’t opener.

30. How do you make a tissue dance?

Put a little boogie in it.

31. Why don’t crabs give to charity?

Because they’re shellfish.

32. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?

A thesaurus.

33. Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon?

Because he was outstanding in his field and had a brain.

34. How do you catch a whole school of fish?

With bookworms.

35. What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?

Sneakers.

36. What did one wall say to the other wall?

I’ll meet you at the corner.

37. Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?

Because they’re so good at it.

38. What do you get if you cross a snowman and a vampire?

Frostbite.

39. How does a cucumber become a pickle?

It goes through a jarring experience.

40. Why did the tomato turn red?

Because it saw the salad dressing.

41. Why was the math book unhappy?

It had too many problems.

42. What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer.

43. What do you call a pile of cats?

A meowtain.

44. Why did the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two-tired.

45. What did the ocean say to the shore?

Nothing, it just waved.

46. Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long?

Because then it would be a foot.

47. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a dog?